Ye insecurity feeling kya hotha hai bhaiyya

Last few days TV studios of English/ Hindi channels are invaded by people with “insecurity feeling” or “sense of insecurity”. It is an affliction that the richer section finds difficulty in handling. Recently commemorating anniversary of terrorist attack on Mumbai this feeling has become all pervasive. Tragedy of the event withstanding this blogger finds tribulation of these fragile people quite amusing. That they need psychiatric help is quite evident, that they find themselves incapable of handling realities of life is not unexpected. Of course there are remarkable people with amazing resilience but this blog is not about them.

In the opulence of now or never world, pushing out the realities with big curtains, the sequestered life try evading mortality. A feeling of omnipotence and misplaced vigor defines their action. It is when realities barges in that “sense of insecurity” envelopes their little life. They feel cheated and harassed. There is unison “we don’t deserve this” lament. On the sidelines there is also fierce competition among “could have been victims” celebrities trying to capitalize the rush. It is the eyeball chase. Not denying that rare few did raise some relevant questions.

It seems that the sole responsibility of the government is to provide sense of security to this section while majority people in this country don’t even understand what secure life means. What arrogance. It is clear that the Indian government failed miserably to prevent these attacks and the response too was tardy, there has been lots of allegation and counter allegation since (not the least by senior police officers). But the question is how can these attacks be prevented?. Terrorists are mindless people and they care for none. It is quite difficult to anticipate, but yes response could be worked.

Pertinent question here would be when was life secure?. How can life ever be secure?. Don’t people face these realities everyday? I guess we all know that things could change quite drastically any moment. Common people negotiate these everyday, every moment. Indeed living is a risky proposition in the circumstance which most people find themselves in. With all kinds of diseases, violence, misshapes lurking in corners, things are stacked heavily against them, life is stressful. Many give up, many die undeservedly, most survive and stare death back. No not because they are brave, it is just that it is the last option, and yes after few instances it get routine, so habituated. Try figuring out how many people die every day and for what reason, of course behind every death there are many near deaths too. People keep dying for no reason of theirs. Where is then sense of security?.

Negotiating insecurities: this blogger recall feeling terribly insecure sometimes in early part of his life, later as I started my career in Chennai there were lots of rich guys who ran family business, for them job was fun which it really was but somewhere a thought always lurked in me of being one step away from abyss. There were no fall back options. So unless I do something substantial I felt very insecure, in the earlier part it nearly consumed me (even trying exploring what exactly is ‘substantial’). Also the impression given was that these are ‘crucial period of getting experience for furthering career so don’t waste time’, that added to the stress.

Later while I traveled around the country, I got the experience of fragility of life and many times just about managed to scrape through. Don’t know whether it was exuberance of youth or general excitement of traveling to new places I mostly felt insecurity in retrospect “man that could have gone wrong” kind of thing, and incorrigibly forget to take precaution next time!. It was probably during that time I started to carry this note on the first page of diary that I carried (plz click to enlarge). Recently though I carry paper sheet as diaries add to extra weight. One of my weird hobbies is to locate the road map of the accident I see in news. The recent bus accident near Nagrota (HP) is well known to me. Spate of minor train accidents in recent times has left me vaguely uncomfortable.