I am rarely impressed by what I write,
it is always the eternal feeling of 'this could be expressed better'. Then you
spent more time reading discerning writers, thinkers so on. You create framework
of excellence and keep evolving, without losing your footing though -your
presence is indelible. Sometimes when you write some incredible stuffs do come
out, and you enjoy and move on. This poem though stands out. I wrote it few
years back and really forgot about it. Recently I was flipping through and
happen to read. I am totally impressed. This is really there. And I love to
read it again and again. So fortunate that I wrote this.
As I read, I find the word ‘beckon’
a bit jarring, and spent few hours replacing the word, ‘signal’ ‘wave’ are too broad
expressions that it loses the impact, ‘entice’ is cheap, ‘gesticulate’ crude. ‘Summon’
is the word that I am playing with. Though summon goes with the flow it has
to be beckon. Beckon is an expression without words. This feels jarring maybe because
‘beckon’ is not commonly used.
Words are like colors. You have to find the right shade. It has to creatively knit the texture of surrounding and appropriately express firmament of thought. If you look at nature colors are rarely jarring. They melt into each other in an evolutionary sense of subtle and remarkable arrangements that satisfies soul. Crude -bright and tawdry, is out of place and mostly a sign of warning. There are so much of colors we cannot even see that is everyday deal for little insects. When I first started to write I was quite troubled by lack of correct word. Then I came across this wonderful dictionary of synonyms. I got it photostated from a library after much request and pleading -they really wouldn’t, it was not available in the market and I even conspired to tear one page a day and smuggle it out if they didn’t arrange the copy. I emulated sad faces from the movies into the mirror to overwhelm the librarian, it eventually worked -not because of my histrionics, I guess she got tired of me -wearing out people always work and I surely have no problem repeating infinitum! This wonderful dictionary I got photostated into smaller version so as to fit easily and reduce weight while I travelled. It helped me to work out words that are suited to the context and express appropriate nuance gained from much reading. Now ofcourse we have everything on fingertip with grammar and spell check, and recently AI -to comment (interesting) and even suggesting a reworked poem! I must add they need to put in more effort. Not impressed!
