On train, meeting an old man from Hardoi

It may not always be possible to reserve your tickets since most travel is decided on short notice. Even if you do want to reserve the list is too long even in the waiting. This blogger as a policy don’t travel during holidays or festive season it is a logistic disaster, a nightmarish experience. I am really an off season guy!!. It is cheaper and quieter. But shockingly in last few years even off season has become crowded. It seems most people are into traveling anyway. When I least expect a crowd I try to find out the reason they are traveling. In most case it is a sudden decision because of some emergency or some unexpected reasons.

There are many people whom you meet, observe, interact while traveling some leave strong impression. Years back I was traveling from Lucknow to Allahabad a distance of around 6-7 hours, I checked the time table and dropped into the railway station. Surprisingly the platform was as crowded, since there are too many festivals celebrated in this part of the world I thought maybe I had missed some local celebration. Few queries clarified that this is usual, and no it is very much a working day. I couldn’t come in terms with the fact that so many people have some sort of emergency in their life or maybe like me they don’t believe in working!!. Anyway the lesson here was I need to restructure my theory on why people travel?!! To make the matter worse the train was announced to be delayed by half an hour and this they announced every half an hour!!.

The platform was very crowded there was no place to sit. In the mean time the train was further delayed and I started to consider other option like bus. By this time I had also got a place to sit so was reluctant to give up the comfort, very soon the train had arrived-4hours late, and so was the stampede to unreserved compartment, within seconds it was packed to the door. I found myself inside compressed to the side seat. After an hour or so my plight had started to reflect sharply on my face. A man looked up and said he was getting down at the next stop so I better stand next to his seat and so after another hour or so I managed to get few inches. Tired I drowsed, I was awakened by a sharp cry from my lap, I found a kid who was as startled as I was, on my lap, very soon he was dislodged and plucked by hands, it was another station and another swamp of people and noises. It was then I first noticed him, he was an ancient looking man (must be atleast 75, I guessed), wrinkled, lean, carrying a crumpled dirty cloth bag in his one hand, while the other clutching a seat. He did not respond to any of the commotions around and held onto his grip. A stoic grim struggle, it seemed the frail man was used to. Premchand had got his characters from these surrounding was it not??. I couldn’t help asking myself these (those days I dreamt of writing one great story, recently though it is waning, age catching up?. And so looked at people as characters!!, Arrogant me). Looking at him you could easily be transported to small dusty villages of north India that haven’t changed much in centuries. Soon I was in my own ethical struggle….well I should give him the seat (not exactly seat but few inches of space) shouldn’t I?? It was the struggle between mannerism and comfort, what is wrong and right. I was too tired but his haggard face and presence augmented the discomfort, for a moment in this ethical quandary I wished I could vanish or become invisible so as to escape his eyes which sometimes pierced me. Recently I was reading Iris Murdoch’s The Bell (picked up from a second hand book shop in Jabalpur few months back, I stumbled upon a gold mine of cheap spectacular old books, includes Gunter Grass, Iris Murdoch…ended up buying 20 odd books for 500-600Rs. The bookstall owner was ecstatic as I was but for entirely different reason, he never thought he would ever be able to sell these and some of the books were lying there for more than three decades, he informed. He should be right since the books I bought included Abu’s cartoon-1974 edition, 4Rs!!, also a very strange travelogue published in 1975, Sahib, your pony is ready- Diary of an unusual journey across India, by Johann Rudolf Hug, since I am really into travelogue-frankly I am into anything that fancy my interest, I bought this book, that looked quite rare, but found it to be bit too pretentious, at one level patronized the ‘poor but helpful people’. Jabalpur is strongly suggested for those looking for good old books or magazines). These lines from Murdoch’s book came alive and stared me

Dora stopped listening because a dreadful thought had struck her. She ought to give up her seat. She rejected the thought, but it came back. There was no doubt about it. The elderly lady who was standing looked very frail indeed, and it was only proper that Dora, who was young and healthy should give up her seat to the lady who could seat next to her friend. Dora felt the blood rushing her face. She sat still and considered the matter. There was no point in being hasty. It was possible of course that while clearly admitting that she ought to give up her seat she might nevertheless simply not do so out of pure selfishness. This would in some ways be a better situation than what would have been the case if it had simply not occurred to her at all that she ought to give up her seat. On the other side of the seated lady a man was sitting. He was reading his newspaper and did not seem to be thinking about his duty. Perhaps if Dora waited it would occur to the man to give up his seat to the other lady? Unlikely. Dora examined the other inhabitants of the carriage. None of them looked in the least uneasy. Their faces, if not already buried in books, reflected the selfish glee which had probably been on her own a moment since she watched the crowd in the corridor. There is another aspect to the matter. She had taken the trouble to arrive early, and surely ought to be rewarded for this. Though perhaps the two ladies had arrived as early as they could? There was no knowing. But in any case there was an elementary justice in the first comers having the seats. The old lady would be perfectly all right in the corridor. The corridor was full of old ladies anyway, and no one else seemed to be bothered by this, least of all old ladies themselves! Dora hated pointless sacrifices. She was tired after her recent emotions and deserved a rest. Besides, it would never do to arrive at her destination exhausted. She regarded her state of distress as completely neurotic. She decided not to give up her seat.
She got up and said to the standing lady ‘Do sit down here, please. I am not going very far, and I’d much rather stand anyway.’
‘How very kind of you!’ said the standing lady. ‘Now I can sit next to my friend. I have a seat of my own further down, you know. Perhaps we can exchange seats? Do let me help you to remove your luggage.’
Dora glowed with delight. What is sweeter than the unhoped-for reward for virtuous act?

Iris Murdoch is as perfect a writer can get, she is flawless. She is the kind of writer you should read with a hot cup of chocolate coffee lying next to huge aquarium, fancy that??!!. ..well if you don’t have all these comfort then her writing will transfer you to cozy little world of interesting characters. There culture milieu may be different, geographical setting alien but emotions, predicaments are universal. So there I was somewhere between Lucknow and Allahabad in a crowded train very much identifying with a book written (published in 1958) by someone who may have never been to this part of the world. Astounding!!. So even if you don’t want to give the seat and try to be ‘strong’, you do end up doing entirely opposite!!. Ethical predicaments!!

I though worked out a compromise, after half an hour so when my legs had started to sting against the wooden seat, I offered him the seat and stood next to him. He didn’t smile or show any gratitude. He ensconced into few inches of space as if it was designed for him, he fitted in perfectly, it was as if his body was elastic. After an hour or so I asked him to get up and he got up as immediately as he had sat, no question asked, no smile exchanged. It was as if we were working in the hands of fate, diminishing my act benevolence which I found very irritating. After a station or two the person next to me got up, the old man occupied the seat. We were three people sitting on the seat meant for one, next to the window. His bones jabbed into me, he was all bones with a sheet of skin over it. Finally bored with monotony of things around I ventured to talk, very much apprehensive, since he didn’t seem like a person who would enjoy talking

Aap kahan ja rahe ho chacha? (in here people refer to old men as chacha in public, there is a stress in second cha. I love the Hindi of this region. They are very civilized and respectful-sabyya, in the way they use the language. Hindi finds its best expressions here, particularly old timers of Banaras). And just like the character in Premchand he referred to me as babuji (…I found it amusing if not embarrassing. Here I was twenty-something too much into trash fellow, being referred to as ‘babuji’ by an elderly, poor but dignified man!!). There was resignation in the way he said things. He told that he was going to Banaras and had got in from a place before Lucknow, the name I recall after much thinking as Hardoi. He was traveling alone. What about luggage? He looked at the cloth bag, it had started to tear, he held his hands over it as if he was carrying something precious. It sure was precious; it was his wife’s ashes he was taking to immerse in Ganges (ganga mayyia, as he said). In that crowded train looking at that bag, precariously held by those frail hands a realization struck me: if a single life is so precious, how is that people are ready to kill so many people. Every time there is bomb blasts or riots this thought comes back hunting and the image of that old crumpled man who when I asked:
‘kahan ja rahe ho chacha?’

Said with an effort to smile ‘bahuth dhoor jha rahe hai babuji…..bahuth dhoor….’

So who is above law???

‘National news channels’ are embarrassments many a times. Well it must be the competition, the market demand…and who ever said these forces would lead to ‘value for money’ or refinement??. They sometimes hit rock bottom. Pity these people and their occupation and market constraints (nopes it’s not about censor!!). News is already a serious entertainment, the fun turns into ecstasy when movie actors and actresses are involved. It is a real (very real) reality show and easy excuses for clips from movies, every honchos dream come true. I pity the slaves though (I hope the “journalists” have safeguards as is given to any labour, sometimes this blogger feels they are treated inhumanly by their masters), risking their life to get the ‘bite’, running around with camera, jostling, pushing and finally making that non event into breaking news is quite a task. I sometimes admire the dedication…there is a self congratulatory atmosphere when they first ‘break news’ (such an achievement that one….geez I love it when I know it first, I as a viewer is jumping to watch it first!!). Fun can be nauseating when it extends to tragedies, one scoundrel masquerading as journo was found jubilant that it was ‘our’ channel which brought the Mumbai train blasts first. As the tragedy unfolded he kept reminding the viewers that it was his channel that broke the new, a proud glee to match. Business is important but it has to follow rules and norms like sensitivity. If no rules then it has to be made, self regulation works in egalitarian society and media is definitely not reflection of these.

The ‘breaking news’ now is about an actor going to jail, the black buck killing case. Nobody is above the law is a good thought. One wonders though whether political clout can help people claw above the law. Yes they can and that is precisely why I am writing this. ‘Tiger’ Pataudi (tiger sure…pussy cat story??) was caught red handed some years back with black buck carcass (our man was hurrying for lunch, meat was the ingredient missing, our man went out for some hunting, well that is what we did hundreds of years back, just following the tradition dude…our man is stuck in medieval age is not a coincidence!!). Why is this man not arrested or even tried, this blogger demands to know. Evidences against Pataudi boy are much stronger than Salman Khan. If Salman Khan be prosecuted then what prevents law to take action against Pataudi??. Also take into account the circumstances under which Pataudi was caught indicates that it was not his first outing, he is a habitual offender is clear according to the witnesses as also the kind of preparation he did, even carrying portable fridge!! also note the gut was removed so as to preserve the body. The gun I am told he bought as a gift to his daughter (what kind of family is this!!...they could be ideal case of ‘American dream’!!). The fact that Pataudi enjoys his summer in Lords watching cricket while cases against him are pending is unsettling, don’t know whether he symbolizes ‘secularism’ (the final redemption act. Turd a family friend is also not a coincidence!!). Maybe a change in Government at the centre may see some action…geez that then will be ‘political vendetta’. Don’t we have recipe for all events. It also reffered to as fall back option in formal circle!!

The sad part in this context is unlike Pataudi, Salman Khan doesn’t have political clout…that is also the tragedy of the nation. Law seems to work on political context!!. Some people can do no wrong. Even wrong is right!!.

Post script: One may not like Sanjay Gandhi for his actions during Emergency but I do have admiration for Maneka Gandhi (the unfortunate split in Gandhi family has given space for lickers to effectively position, Pataudi just an example). Maneka Gandhi is very committed lady, it is not a mean achievement to have your name synonymous to ‘protection of animals against atrocities’. When I was in college I thought she was bit too belligerent ….but the kind of manipulations, blatant disregard for animals rights, I have started to identify with her. I also watched the program she anchored long back (decade back in DD) it gave insight into happenings against animals. I though feel vegetarianism is personal choice (I just love sea food!!). Laws on atrocities against animals should be taken seriously, in many European countries they even have agencies to check on how you treat your pets and you could be arrested. Killing endangered species is heinous and should never be pardoned. Pataudi is a criminal who should be arrested as immediately.

Dude its about protecting us!!.

There is a stampede going on to protect us!!. God knows from what. Protection it seems will come from making more bombs. Big protection from bigger bombs. National pride is another spin off. Manmohan Singh wants to protect us. Prakash Karat wants to protect us more. Every leader worth his/her salt wants to protect us (incidentally Americans also strongly believe in protecting its ‘children’ so they also attacked Iraq, incidentally!!). The idea of protecting its citizens (also read children) is quite groovy. It is theory at its best with maximum freedom to kill others. It is about preserving self interest theorized at national level, practiced at party/clan level very much for personal benefit.

There was this man, who was very passionate about nuclear bombs disarmament, then he became Prime Minster then he transformed into hawk. He has no regrets about attacking a sovereign nation, everything for people’s sake, for nations sake, he went on with his characteristic grin (history will judge him he said), then people said enough is enough (even the big Ben has stopped ringing, incidentally), he had to resign. Now he is back to square one and so has become an activist again, this time its global warming, its Palestine problem. Sow what do we learn from this story??. Well nothing!.

If the government of India and the protesting political parties had taken the stand against nuclear bombs it would have made sense. Nuclear bombs are against humanity, it’s not a theory it is reality. I guess some get too habituated in discussion, argument, counter argument, deals, interest, counter interest, this point, that point….they forget that they are talking about safeguarding ‘national interest’ on blatantly unethical premise. In this twisted world it becomes ‘sovereign right’ to conduct nuclear test. What kind of ‘sovereign right’ is this??. All of these leaders may live for 20 to 30 years more, or less (everybody has to die one day is also not a concept!!). They might have protected the nation by creating more scoundrels with twisted world view the fact remains that they have contributed significantly to make this world more fragile and dangerous place to live in. The ‘national interest’ of nations has definitely pushed humanity to extinction.

It is a request of this blogger to all the global tourists to avoid countries that stockpile nuclear bombs. Unethical nations and its agenda can only be countered with concrete steps that hurt their economy. USA, Britain, France, China, Russia, India, Israel, Pakistan…should be boycotted by the people, including its citizens at all forums. If millions of tourists coming to India take a vow that they will not visit any country that stocks nuclear bombs, then it will have significant affect on this nation’s economy. If people around the world avoid Indian products and prefer Sri Lankan or Bangladeshi product (if the quality difference is minimal) it will straighten this rogue behavior (some morons also think it as super power right!!. Since when was US of A a model to idealize?).

It is important to make ‘anti nuclear bomb’ idea fashionable to youngsters. Youngsters should know that behind this charade of bickering politicians- for the nation they want to protect, rhetoric, these scoundrels are anti life, anti human, anti peace, anti hope, anti dream, anti future…..

(children around the world praying for sanity, against Nuclear bombs. So does an old lady in Japan....for them Sovereignty is not theory, Bombs are not for peace) photos taken from Net

The new Vice President and some recollections

I have had absolutely no idea about Mr. Hamid Ansari before he was elected as the Vice President, my ignorance. He being the Chairperson of National Commission of Minority is what I associate with. Long back (I guess 1997-8) I had the opportunity to interview Tahir Mahmood the Chairperson of NCM at that time. I was ecstatic and not to be caught on the wrong foot I spend few weeks in preparing for the interview, asking intelligent and insightful questions is as difficult. Even now more than the interviewed I do focus more on what are the questions asked and why!!!.

I wouldn’t have classified myself as journalist but yes they did, and it was entirely new ‘occupation’ for me!!. The tag of ‘media’ can be quite heady. Tahir Mahmood I recall was laconic with permanent grave expression etched on his face. Even when I cracked, what I thought was a good joke, his response was studied, just a shade of amusement (geez was I disappointed!!). Well I guess in retrospect it was good antidote for my excited self, those days I did cross those lines frequently!.

NCM is not a constitutional body but it has specific function of safeguarding the minorities- religion and linguistic. One had to however know the provisions for minorities in the Constitution, the reference point. Therefore I spend lots of time in Central Sectariat library, it is a multistory building with well stocked books (they had amazing colorful books on aquarium fishes) as also rare documents but unfortunately the staffs were not much inclined on books (they even forgot to properly cover the books when the building was being whitewashed!!. Also they were not much bothered about readers and so had to listen to chunnu munnu’s mummy’s latest. This library also became my favorite haunt later to escape summer heat, ended reading up stuff I never thought I ever would!!). During that time ‘conversions’ was becoming something of a discussion point because of various happenings. It was while I was going through these that I came to know about the discussions that preceded adoption of each Article of the Constitution. Like for instance the word ‘profess, practice and propagate’ (of Article 25) was discussed in great detail, each word dissected and put into context and significance. It was an amazing experience and as one goes through these debates in Constituent Assembly you could easily get transported to those ambitious exciting days of a nascent nation.

And what about the interview with Mr.Mahmood??

Well I don’t know whether it was published or not since I had quit by then. So that was my short stint as a journo!!. Another job, another day!!

It happens only in India

You detain a person for almost ten years and then pass a verdict of his innocence!!. In the mean time take high moral grounds in international forums. This can happen only in India. And this is precisely what happened in the case of Abdul Nasser Madhani. It is shocking and more shameful is the silence surrounding these. This is a very serious indictment of Indian Judiciary, and influence of vested interests on law machinery. Madhani is a political leader with significant following, not necessarily communal (frankly this blogger is scared of so called ‘secular’ people. They are more damaging!!). Further he need be understood from the context of his background as religious preacher. I happened to listen to part of his speech in early 1990s (quite accidentally, I was stuck in a traffic jam in Thiruvanthapuram and had decided to walk), he was fiery and intimidating. I found it puzzling and disgusting. But then later I came to hear much worse from others (read right wing Hindus. However I still believe babri masjid- an unused mosque, demolition has much less significance to most people unlike what ‘secularists’ or right elements in islam and hindus want to believe to stoke passion and hence make a living) who have since become national leaders as also irritants going in the name of ‘secularism’. All equally obnoxious and appalling. Madhani in the mean time was misused by political parties and entrenched power groups for their own motives; I won’t be surprised if the same were active in his detention. One sincerely hopes he be wary of ‘secular’ trap of scoundrels in Left (to quote him ‘vikaarthil pravarthikunekayi nallaya vicharichu pravarthikunethu’. He surely has learned his lessons on political survival in Gods own country!!). He was freed because he was innocent and not because of any political reasons. One hopes he will be able to provide some respite for people in Kerala from the two party swindling that has been taking place for sometime now, if not third front a significant pressure group.

Mr. Madhani has changed, matured significantly in all these years. Now I find him a very normal and still quite passionate man, at personal level I also find him quite likable and trustworthy. He still is an amazing orator. How will the State or society compensate his years of detention is something this blogger would like to know (or demands to know)?. Who is responsible for this blatant injustice?

Celebrating two years of blogging!!!!

Technology is incredible. It does provide so many opportunities, one never could imagine few years back. I started blogging July 2005 (12th to be precise) with a poem, it was a tentative attempt but has flourished since. I also have few other blogs, some connected with this one while others I open with different id. Calculating the number of posting in this blog and connected blogs (like depalans.blogspot.com and sdepalan.blogspot.com….trashing Turd not included. Turd is insignificant!!) comes to more than 200 odd postings. That is about 8 postings per month which is almost two postings a week. Not bad!!!.

Blogging is great fun. I don’t really do it with much intention except may be to get involved with few things around. It is about things one comes across. The other day I was watching ‘Tarkovsky’s home’ in my DVD. I came across these lines

“…let them all believe
let them laugh at their passions
because what they call passion is not some spiritual energy
but just a friction between the soul and the outer world
and firstly,
let them believe in themselves…”

One would not know whether it is ‘just a friction’ but some things around does make it inevitable, to respond. I really don’t consider myself much passionate but yes always had this great desire to explore spirituality, in my mid twenties. Tarkovsky is right about ‘believe’ in oneself. This blogger argues that this is what it seems lacking in most people in public life, effective positioning, extolled by popular media. The commerce has finally found cause. Cause is now tax saver!!. Cause is now awards and perks. The reason why we see these mutually contradictory mindsets thriving in an individual (extended to society) is for the stampede to gain, ethics is the prime liability. So issues get juxtaposed to marketability. Like for instance the reason why AIDS issue (thank god the figures have gone down!) has attracted so much attention has less to do with the disease or the real issue. These self appointed conscience keepers squatting Media-TV studios and other public space (I really don’t have much against politicians, they are elected representatives) have no reference point except maybe personal gain or get acceptance of West and thus cling on. This lack of ‘believe’ system according to this blogger, is where the threat is, since they can stoop to any level for even small gains. Market has a significant role but it shouldn’t be allowed to define all that is sacred to us. This blogger had always maintained that the business of Business is Business (the Government cannot ‘request’ business community, either you make laws or keep shut), charity within the ambit of Business is a cynical attempt on Brand building and should be taxed.

I don’t take blogging seriously, it is quite exciting though. The very idea of easy access to public space is astounding. Technology undoubtedly has been a great source of democratizing, at a level it is liberating. I wouldn’t have spend so much time in Delhi if I knew about blogging!!. I take Internet seriously and spend two odd hours a day exploring interesting sites and writings (and videos), its immense, its amazing.

I am very keen on v-blogging, it is amazing if you could post video with the text. Although photography has incredible possibilities this blogger took it up very recently, just around 7-8 years back, previously I never thought about ‘capturing’ space. I still try not to think about camera much when traveling, it’s interference. I find digital camera quite an interesting invention; you actually can see the result instantly unlike reel camera wherein you have to wait for the film to get over. Amazing I tell you. I recall instant camera when I was kid (later I came to know it is referred to as Polaroid), someone known had come back from ‘persia’ (it is a big event) and showed me this amazing camera, you click and the photo slide down, a minute or two the photos emerge. That technology, against all expectation, didn’t catch up with public…wonder why?.

We had a typewriter at home, I never thought the keyboard could ever be used (I practiced it as a career option when I was in school, most people whom I knew at that time started their career as stenos!! Incidentally I also learned short hand for few months during school summer vacation, in kerala, ‘job security’ was the fuelling factor for these initiations. My summer vacation repertoire (??!!) also includes working in vehicle mechanics workshop assisting repairing car/scooter repair, hated it) till the computer came along. Internet is the best thing to happen and blogging excellent outcome. It is overwhelming. Technology is God.

Blogging is the opportunity I ever could have, the more you think about its possibilities more exciting it is. I sure will be blogging for a very long time to come and keep refining/upgrading in whatever way possible.

Crossing the Blue lines: A tribute to buses!!

The recent spate of killings by blue line buses in delhi and the preoccupation of these by ‘national’ channels, took me back to my tryst with these monsters and yes death. (The news on the day I landed in delhi was about a school boy crushed by blue line, a news paper carried the explicit image of the boy, it made me sick and very apprehensive, this was I guess 1995. I went to delhi in later part of 1995 (if I recall rightly) and stayed in single room flat in Regairpura, next to a horse stable!!. Within a month got sick-probably being exposed to cold climate after a long time, and returned, after a year I was back, this time vowing not to quit!!). I had so many close calls with death from buses (particularly in delhi) that I have lost count. It has become so common that I now shrug ‘geez that could have killed me’. But I do recall the very first week I was in delhi and was going to Cannought place and the bus took the turn to minto road, someone said get down here, not being sure of the place and very confused I jumped and slipped right in front of oncoming bus, it was a miracle that I survived, few inches. For a moment I was the object of craning faces from all vehicles in vicinity, and yes some abuse words (marega behnchodh- which has only a ritual significance in delhi). At that time I was not very comfortable in Hindi- not used it for almost a decade, so in crisis situation translating from Malayalam to Hindi in the mind consumed precious moments, ended up in very awkward situations (after an year or two I had mastered even the delhi accent!!). This is precisely what happened once during the same period, the bus was moving from daula kua to karol bagh, it is a isolated route with no stopping. It was very crowded bus and I was hanging out and the grip started to pain by the time I realized in the duress that it is ‘roko bhaiyya’, I had started to slip surely I would be seriously injured so I screamed and people thought something had happened so they also screamed and the vehicle stopped!!. Quite an experience that one.

Many a accidents are not because of the drivers fault, the people themselves are to be blamed. Many times I cheated death and I knew I had committed the mistake; somewhere the concept of mistake itself gets blurred, since they don’t stop or you look for convenience and jump. Incidentally jumping from moving bus has its own special thrill, the reason why this blogger hates closed door buses like say in Bangalore. There are some novice who sometimes try going against the motion of the bus (I don’t call them stupid but ignorant), that is when the chela shout with utmost pleasure ‘behnchodh bihari’. Ustad also joins in with a wink (they have no liking for biharis, so much so it is an abuse word). Before jumping I used to shout ‘ustad break lag dhio jara’ of course this has absolutely no effect on him, but he is aware that I am jumping, a signal, with a futile attempt at touching his softer side, he may glance at you and you go with an obsequious best ‘laga de yaar’. If it works he will slow down. It is sometimes the passenger who instigate. Further these drivers work under tremendous pressure. That doesn’t mean they aren’t reckless many of them are serious maniacs. Once I was traveling at night during winter, a drunkard thought it was his day under the sun and so started talking crap he shifted his attention to a Sardarji and next few minutes started praising Sikhs in general and so on. I moved next to the driver, very soon I realized that he was driving quite recklessly almost running over a couple on the scooter. People seem to have had enough with the drunkard and one could hear shouts from rear. It was then that the driver came out with his masterpiece “behchodh piya hai tho pait meh rakh, mujko dekh koi batha sakhtha hai ki quarter pee ke baitha hoon!!!!”. I immediately got down at the next stop.

If speed alone is the criteria then the Pvt bus drivers in ernakulam-cochin are the most dangerous in the country and I say it with lot of authority as an experienced passenger having traveled in buses in most cities in India. The Pvt short route buses in kerala though are very clean and a pleasure to travel with well mannered conductors. In TN though the experience of traveling in Pvt bus can be horrendous since they believe in ‘blasting music’ the louder the better it seems. I once told to reduce and the man smiled as if I was attempting to humor!!. The buses in Hindi heartland is entirely different experience, here the first surprise is ‘ok this bus can start, ok it has started lets see if it can move, ok it is moving now lets see if it can run…surprise surprise!!’. Don’t be amused if you have animals or poultry as co passenger. The buses in deccan region are slightly better. The buses in Kolkota are relic with wooden seats. Very few cities though have fleet of double decker buses except maybe Mumbai. Trivandrum had two and I made it a point to travel in them while in college, it feels great to be at the top front seat, you get a different perspective of traffic.

Traveling in buses can have many lighter moments like for instance there was this obese lady who was complaining about being squeezed while trying to get out in a very crowded bus. She shouted at a man, he retorted ‘aap motti hai tho hamari galthi hai kya!!’.

Creating terrorists

Indian society except maybe in some pockets of Metros is unlike West. Here social status, prestige, honor etc are important ingredients in social relation and defines society to a large extend. Of course it does lead to regressive practice and can threat individualism however the influence of the above mentioned is significant. So when the PM of Australia finds it necessary to mention that an Indian is ‘detained’ and later mindless media juxtaposes the ‘story’ with terrorists and car bombs the implication is obvious. It is shocking the way things are handled.

The investigation agency in the West has to act responsibly and should have a code of conduct in revealing details to Media. What does it gain by publicizing this detail of an Indian ‘detained’ is beyond logic. He is almost a terrorist now, who will take the responsibilities of these mischiefs. If he is proved guilty then punish but don’t allow people to be prosecuted by sensational seeking media. One wonders whether the Investigating agencies are trying to hide their incompetence or is it a panic response or is it their way of assuring general public about the ‘progress in the case’?. My hunch is that it is political pressure and combination of above. They are also in a way trying to define the ‘other’. These are critical moments and whatever is said during these periods is blown up and scrutinized in detail, even though the reality maybe quite far. It gets into the subconscious, even if the man is found not guilty. It is not about the allegations (in this case the word is ‘detained’) it is the characterization, the attempt to classify and most importantly the opportune moment to connect these. So we have images of burning vehicles and the word ‘detained’-securitizing the hapless man and his family. Don’t be surprise if all ‘Asian Muslims’ in west is looked upon as suspicious by common people; they are just exhibiting their subconscious impressions. Slowly but surely subconscious exhibits itself in conscious actions, this is where political manipulations gets its space.

This is not to deny that some sick people are into creating violence, and yes in Britain most do fall into the pattern. The question is what about people who are innocent but fall into these created patterns? Will the apology (if he is not guilty) to the ‘detained’ man give him his dignity or take away the public ignominy? What about the intense pain the family is going through?

Britain has not only failed to deal with radical elements but is a source of instigation in other places. How much radical elements from Britain influenced the obstinate stand taken by Sikh heads vis-à-vis Dera Sacha as also the fueling of lal masjid in Islamabad need be studied. Afterall it was Britain which gave asylum to all the zealots in an arrogant understanding of Human rights. Chickens have come to roost!!

Post script: I apologize for writing things wrong about Pyramids. I did some study in the Net and found that the creators, workers etc of the Pyramids were actually looked after well, my ignorance, my mistake. Pyramids are undoubtedly the most astounding structures in the world. Ancient Egyptians were quite refined people, the care with which they have chiseled each and every space and stone is incredible. Ancient Egyptians (like the Incas of South America, the creators of amazing Machu Pichu) had something divine about the way they visualized surroundings.

The wonders that make India

The other day I happen to catch glimpses of interview with Union Culture Minister in front of the Taj Mahal. Glimpses here means just about a minute or was it the promo? Anyway this particular Minister is not someone whom you would give second thought. I guess the occasion was the hoopla over ‘wonders of the world’. For this blogger the ‘wonder of the world’ is the Union Minister herself!! The poster girl of Emergency as Culture Minister of 2007 is nothing short of ‘wonder’.

One of the dictionary meanings of ‘wonder’ is ‘the feeling aroused by something strange and surprising’. I don’t know whether in Indian context it is ‘strange or surprising’. Since we have another ‘wonder’ in the name Sharad Pawar who is a disaster as Agriculture Minister as also BCCI President- it’s a shame, but that doesn’t prevent him from clawing for ICC President. Wonders of the world!! Yes it is also about sacred ‘competence and merit’.

Ambika Soni is a study on sycophancy: Selected to Rajya Sabha as early as 1976 (during Emergency to be precise), then in 2000 as also 2004. When one is into sycophancy getting elected by people is for lesser mortals. Ambika Soni is not one of the rare ‘leaders’ who have never got elected to Lok Sabha. The ‘wonder’ is she has been ‘national leader’ for close to three decades, not mean achievement by Indian standards, very tenacious indeed.

As most sycophants worth their salt she has now realized the spin off of Market savvy. So some disgusting TV program in other country does keep her awake. She has absolutely no qualm in spending Tax payer’s money in coming out with ‘full page’ ad to ‘invite’ some third rate actor of third rate program to ‘experience Indian hospitality’. The alacrity and timing I am told was admired by NRI couch potatoes. Quite audacious our lady, I guess we need not blame her, market suaveness does have its deep pits!

There seems to be frenzy going on in certain market driven circles to ‘declare’ Taj Mahal as ‘wonder of the world’. It is a huge market gimmick which the common people should definitely be wary of. Who are the people deciding these ‘wonders’? Surely the mobile phone companies are a major beneficiary. And why should we spend our money to sms for market gimmick. No self respecting Indians should indulge in these.

A tourist should not visit Taj Mahal because it is classified by some people as some ‘wonder’, it might excite children though. This blogger has visited Taj Mahal when he was in school (as also all India tour in college). It is great to look at particularly from a distance. It is definitely an architectural wonder like the Pyramids. However the romanticization part is bit overdone. Shah Jahan’s love for his wife Mumtaz is understandable but what is not understandable is cruelty met to the workers and builders of Taj (if the stories of them being maimed are true). Surely the workers also had their loved ones, how Shah Jahan’s love precedes their’s is not clear to this blogger. This darker side should be mentioned in the brochures. The miseries of hundreds of people shouldn’t be lost in the packaging. History is not only about rulers it is also about common people, and democratic India is duty bound to spell these, inspite or despite the Market compulsions. The civilized societies around the world should take note of these whether it is Coliseum or Pyramids, the history/brochure on these should be comprehensive, and need include miseries of common people. It is not history otherwise…

Free Aung San Suu Kyi

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Advice to Media from Desmond Tutu

Archbishop Desmond Tutu called on the media to be more careful in their choice of words when reporting on religious conflict. Tutu, who won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1984, said that broad understanding of trouble spots was often complicated by the language used to describe the activities of people or religions involved in them. Tutu called for tolerance and understanding of religions.
"I would hope that you in the media would be passionate about letting people judge for themselves, that you would be careful about some of the language that you do actually use," he said.
"'Muslim terrorism' - have you ever read anywhere 'Christian terrorism'? - as if Islam propagates violence, but you have never spoken about what happened in Northern Ireland as Christian terrorism," he said.
"Fundamentally there is no faith that I know that propagates violence, that says it's a good thing to oppress anybody."
Tutu said he recognized the media could be a force for good but that it had responsibilities.
"You have a very powerful media. I know because you helped us very much in our struggle to tell our story. You did it for us and we benefited enormously."
Tutu added, however, that understanding different religions required peoples of all faiths to understand different perspectives.
"We Christians ought to get off our high horse and learn to be a great deal more humble, when you look at our history, the bloody things that we did in the name of religion," he said.
Tutu, 75, is the former Anglican archbishop of Cape Town and won the Nobel Peace Prize for his work against apartheid.

Discrimination of HIV kids…

It is shocking the way the children are being treated in a school in Kottayam (Kerala). When I say children I mean both the HIV infected and the normal children. The reasons of parents sound cruel but the apprehensions need be understood in socio-cultural context. I recall even the most advanced societies dealt the disease in similar manner in the initial period. If you recall one Basket ball player in USA (magic Johnson, I recollect) was discriminated and had to quit (I have a vague recollection I could be wrong. I recall photo of his bleeding hand). Also many celebrities even hid the disease, like Rock Hudson. The point I am making here is the Metro based media and TV channels should stop being judgmental about the parents and desist accusing them of some serious misdemeanor. They may not be as cruel as is being made out. It is easy to pass judgment and show oneself as some kind of saviors in TV studios.

This blogger wants to know how many HIV infected students are studying in ‘prestigious schools’ or for that matter any of the schools in rich neighborhoods. They don’t even allow poorer sections, in clear violation of rules. Further they get huge money from abroad in the name of AIDS (it has become quite a chic disease to deal, a burgeoning cottage industry) why is the money not spend to take care of these children. This blogger suspects that the money is wasted on high profile events and photo ops at the expense of grass root work. This blogger tried his best to get the data of number of children suffering from AIDS in this country and how are they being counseled. I could get nothing. It is a shame. The shame is nearer home of many of those who are taking high moral grounds, care to admit.

This blogger empathize with the HIV infected children, as also apprehensive parents of other children…

Very wrong Mr. President

APJ Abdul Kalam did a tremendous job as President of India. He definitely is an inspiring man, gave dignity to the post. But his attempt to second term is unbecoming. Retiring from the post of President will give him more opportunity to constructively engage with society, in particular the youngsters with whom he is very popular. What the official commitments prevented him from doing, he could now impartially put his effort and energy. He has done whatever he could as the President and now could contribute more post retirement. He is unnecessarily dragging himself into controversy and sullying the respect people have for him. This blogger is looking forward to listen to his lecture post retirement, as it will make him easily accessible.

Although one would prefer a ‘non political’ Governor or President, Prathiba Patil is eminently qualified to be the next President of India. Again, Mr. Kalam has done an incredible job, he should exit with dignity.

This blogger has taken special interest in listening to people holding responsible position after they retire. One reason is it cuts down the nonsense crowd. Second is, a person once leaving the position turns more interesting, probably because they could say things they wouldn’t /couldn’t while holding the post!!. Last but not least they are more enlightening as also engaging with experience and anecdotes. The only person I was not able to listen to was Boutros Boutros Ghali, deeply regret it, I was not allowed in. Mr.Ghali was excellent as UN Secretary General, it would have been insightful to listen to him.

Prathibha tai for President

Quite clearly Ms. Pratibha Patil will be the next President. What one can make out is that she does have impeccable credentials, whatever doubt on her individuality one had (since one couldn’t stop wondering whether it is reason for sycophancy) was cleared yesterday when she made statement on Purdah. It is a reflection on her sincerity and speaking the mind without fear, taking that risk is what makes her my favorite. Also the intention of the speech was to encourage girls of the community to come out of conservative hold and constructively participate in progress, she gave example of Kalpana Chawla and so on, clearly the controversy morons are trying to create is taken out of context (Rajasthan is quite a backward state in terms of HDI, it does have some very successful business community though). Quite obviously the reason she has been in significant positions is not because of some packaging or other deviousness, she is genuine. In the world where there is a stampede on ‘political correctness’ at the expense of truth and positioning for gain she does come as healthy respite. It requires immense courage and conviction. She is dignifying and at the same time unassuming also, makes her my favorite. She has been member of State Legislature and Parliament, even as deputy chairperson of Rajya Sabha, now Governor. Pratibha Patil is eminently qualified to be the first woman President of India.

There though is factual error in her claim that Mughals where the reason for obnoxious Purdah (veil) system in region of Rajasthan. Ms. Patil is not entirely wrong though, invaders where the reason for some regressive practices is not an uncommon knowledge but Mughals needn't be classified as one. Few years back if such statements were made I would be concerned and would ask to concentrate on real issue than going to the history, now though things have changed with mullahs and their practices being seen as epitomizing ‘secularism’ and quite nauseatingly ‘culture’!!. Not that Indian society was egalitarian before Muslim invasions, it was undoubtedly a patriarchal society but there were large pockets where things were quite open that is beyond Brahminical hold- it definitely was not a closed society like in West during the same period. Patriarchal it was but it cannot be denied that some practices got credence after invasion, in particular of the Muslims. It is not a coincidence that the practice is followed in Rajasthan even now- the main route of the invasions, many were converted but Rajasthanis were stoic. It was to ‘protect women’ as also they gradually followed the elite practices propagated by ruling power (mughals to be specific) that the practice of purdah took root. This blogger had visited many forts in Rajasthan, there are sites referred to as ‘jowar’ where women suicide en masse (one can find parallel in Sikh women jumping into well during partition) to avoid capture. Most medieval invaders were scoundrels but that doesn’t mean a community need be tarnished. There are two points here: one, happenings of medieval period needs to be seen in the context of the time (the same reason why Veil-covering whole face, is disgusting). Second, ordinary people have nothing to do with rulers. So I being a Hindu and therefore somewhere responsible for whatever some scoundrel Maharaja did few hundred years is ridiculous, unless of course I claim pride in him and his actions. The same hold for Muslims. Meaning, the general public did not have anything much to do with intrigues of elite, this true then it is true now.

Bairon Singh Shekawat is an excellent candidate for the post of President, a leader of stature and dignity. I can claim to know him personally!!!. Well it’s like this we were invited for his daughter’s wedding. It was in 1980 or 81 and he was the CM of Rajasthan. I still recall it vividly since it was the most lavish wedding I ever attended. I was also ecstatic since I was wearing new dress, we had purchased it few hours back as there was a realization that I don’t really have a proper cloth for the occasion!!. We kids had some great time running around what seemed to me as never ending pandals and rows of food. We bumped into Mr. Vajpayee (and Mr. Advani), who asked us where we stayed, one of us chided him for not knowing the place. Mr. Vajpayee laughed out loudly (I rate him as the best politician in contemporary India apart from Manmohan singh). It is not always that you bump into future Prime minister!!.

Way to go Rev. Thampu

The Dalit reservation in St. Stephen is definitely a right step forward; the shocking part is why it was not implemented till now. St. Stephen is quite a prestigious college with a majestic building to match, this blogger had the chance to visit many a times as part of job. The contribution of Christianity to Indian education system is quite significant. Unfortunately almost all the elite schools and colleges in India were ransacked by licker’s children, and since defining competence. The reason for demand for Christian missionary school and college has also to do with ethos of serving and compassion associated with Christianity which has contributed in the form of some very dedicated and sincere staffs who take it as part of their mission. Of course with commercialization things have changed but the core of setting these institutions was not about profit but an extension of service which Christianity holds very dear. Religion has lots of negative things but the positives can be counted more and one being this. The demands for missionary schools have also to do with quality of English language education.

Clearly till now most prestigious schools and colleges run by missionaries were contributing to very narrow section of elite-direct beneficiaries of colonialism, so the benefits haven’t reached to marginalized section. Further these colonial style environments have bred some very arrogant set of people who unfortunately also formed part of policy making and other significant positions. The reason why people from marginalized section couldn’t be in these positions has to do with lack of opportunity than the so called competence of elite. The contribution of Indian elite is a joke. Some arrogant have even written books on how Indian literature in India is irrelevant without contributions from Stephenites!. To be fair the overwhelming mediocrity in English literature (surprising how they get publishers!!) has to a large extend to do with alumni circle of Stephen. Many excellent English writers are not from Stephen is not a coincidence. Not denying few of my favorite authors like Amit Chaudhri and Amitav Ghosh (our man though has become very market savvy recently. Turd influence?) are from Stephens, but the arrogance is what I am questioning, since very few are great, most others used these facilities to propagate a mindset that has been the curse on Indian society. Success of most peoples from these (social science, literature etc subject offered without all India competitions or other considerations) ‘prestigious colleges’ around the country (writers included) have also to do with synergizing with elite mindset and lifestyle. Why is that education facilities in metros reserved for students from within cities thus usurping all the development benefits?. They should learn to migrate to different places, rather than ensconce in the comfort and then teach us competence or other ideals (moving their arse in studios). There should be consideration given to students from outside as also poorer sections within cities in prestigious colleges.

The reason why these measures of insuring access to poorer and marginalized sections to quality education has not been taken so far puts a question mark on people who are running these institutions. Many instead of following the beautiful aspects of Christianity have been using this for personal benefits by serving and fulfilling the desires of a narrow section in the name of merit. As clear are some on merit and competence, this blogger still don’t know what merit is, quite confusing!!.

St Stephen has taken a step that is long overdue. The problem here seems to be the question whether dalit do remain dalit after joining Christianity?. As suspected there is elitism in Christianity too, probably the reason why these inclusive steps not taken till now. Not ‘as suspected’, caste and other socio-cultural divisions are as acute in Christianity. It is not only a personal experience but I have read in some sociology text that Nadar Christians in TN are socio-culturally more closer to Nadar Hindus than Christians!!. Dalit reservation in prestigious colleges (need be extended to Mass Media) will definitely fill up the huge lacuna in representation of these sections (like the tribals) in articulating their views not only in national but international level in a constructive way unlike being ‘represented’, particularly by the hypocrite comrades. In this context the blogger express pleasure on learning that October 2^nd is to be declared as Non violence day by UN. How about April 14^th (Ambedkar jayanthi day) as Day against Discrimination (or even Racism)???. I guess the move lacks enough clout (what about India’s prestige??!!).

Rev. Thampu is quite a sensitive man, and I have had the opportunity to interact with him (of course I was disappointed with his comments on grammar in poems…but I guess things I do has large element of disappointment from inception so cannot blame him!!). Further he gave me breakfast!!! Now this might sound quite insignificant to some but for me these are very defining. To allow a complete stranger this access and to be treated with dignity was a surprise. Shock would be the correct word, since those days (I guess it was1997-98) abuse was quite common so was maintaining sanity. He even dropped me to bus stop in his car despite my very vehement protest. If you look from my perspective you will realize how significant these are. Of course he does have a patronizing handshake (typical of pallile achan!), so there was a bit of wriggle when I attempted to rectify!!. I have tried to follow his views in media for sometime; I did like the columns with Swami Agnivesh (i have a reverence for him). I also have been to church few times and have read few chapters from Bible (Genesis is sheer poetry), have attended many Christmas parties and get together. More than a decade back I used to be friendly with a “father’’ from Velloppally dioceses (I used to stay in beach front flat marine drive and used to drop in to watch sunset regularly- in cochin, he was also involved in AIDS awareness those days). Many of my close friends were Christians, frankly we never really thought on these lines except when it was getting some treat during festivals. During those days we also had some collection of jokes on “pallile achan”. But yes I don’t have much liking for Bandhi christhus nor the screaming cold eyed evangelist particularly from American subcontinent, they sometimes speak like Marketers!!.

The boss is here!!!

I am into Rajnikanth movies since college days. It was quite accidental since we used to stay in a lodge next to the college and there was this guy who was a tamilian, also there was a theatre nearby which showed Tamil cinema once in a while. Also once or twice in a week there would be strike in college (during internal exams we planned the strike….one commonly used ploy was 'no water in hostel' and so orchestrated march to college corridor with buckets and mugs!!) if there was no college strike there would be hartal or protest march in the city so things got cancelled. The gist is we had lots of time and studies was last thing in mind, with many having bikes/cars we invaded beaches, Kovalam in day time and Shankumukum for late night. It used to get routine so I would move out to do something different and one involvement was catching on Tamil movie, mostly alone. It was then I got stuck to Rajnikanth movie (the theatre also showed old hit movies). Shifting to Chennai added to the flavor but what I saw in here was beyond my imagination. Frankly I never knew much about ‘fan craze’. Chennai is the place to know what Rajnikanth is all about!!. Once there was huge traffic jam as they were celebrating 'Rajni’s B’day' (thalaivar). Tamil Nadu for me was quite a different place with huge innovative hoardings. The more I spend time here the more I started understanding people. I too started looking forward to Rajnikanth movie. He is quite a stylish actor with surprisingly not much pretension, I guess that’s what makes him endearing. And yes Njan oru thavana sulurai nooru thavana sola mathiri… I think that’s a classic dialogue. Also this one I came across recently (I don’t seem to have watched that movie) njan late ayi varuthen latest ayi varuthen. When I come late I come as latest!!!!!!!!!!!!! …..of course English lack the punch. You cannot beat his style and delivery, so what may look inane comes out as spectacular and instantly applauded (applauded is an understatement here!!!).

Rajnikanth is great. Mind it!!!!...

Sycophants as President???

Well it seems that Congress affiliated sycophants are queuing up for Raisina hill!!. President post is ceremonial but significant in many ways. Since they have somehow reached an understanding on a politician for the post it is better to focus on colossal figures outside this small coterie. Further the post is associated with elderly statesman not conniving sycophants. If the Congress cannot find a suitable candidate who is respectable and impeccable in his/her credential then I don’t see any reason why Bairon Singh Shekhawat shouldn’t be the next president. Too many lickers and positioners are doing the round in the name of secularism, the ‘third front’ should support Mr. Shekhawat who has done a decent job as VP in case better alternative is not suggested. We have had too many Congress sycophants as President, they now don’t have the majority to carry on the show, they should mend their ways. I guess the other partners in coalition should warn them of the consequences.

There are Congress leaders who are admirable like for instance Mr. Chamling of Sikkim who fits in by all means. Also understanding that President’s post (like Governors) has more to do with symbolic gesture, that is, mainstreaming or recognizing region, community and so on.

Condolences: Ramchandra Gandhi who was apart from being grandson of Mahatma Gandhi was brilliant man. Albeit I have read very few of his articles but I have listened to his speeches and boy he was brilliant. When I first saw him I hated him since he gave an impression of khadoos budda with permanent scowl on his face and quite raggy attire. Those days I would drop into IIC (Idlers Idiotic Chatting-centre) very often for listening to some talk as also sip some good free coffee (very soon I decided that I would stay in places with direct access to these talk and free food holes, in summer the AC was a huge respite. So did stay mostly 522 bus route!! It’s essentially the place were retired people spend their time catching up with things, nothing else but yes some yawn and some fart!!).

Coming to Mr. Gandhi one of the speech I recall distinctly is after the nuclear blast by India wherein he dwelled upon tantrum and tantric!!. He was an amazing speaker and although he gave an impression of aloof and laconic when he started to speak he never stopped!!!. Another speech I heard was when he inaugurated a photography exhibition also in IIC where he talked about philosophy of photography!!!. (Incidentally they also served sushi and that was the only time I had that dish…its kind of raw tasting stuff. For sometime I was wondering have they cooked or not??). Ramchandra Gandhi had an insight which I never thought could exist, he was quite original and you could feel he was passionate about what he said since it reflected deep involvement on the subject. He was amazing. I observed he interacted with very few people. I met him only at IIC and it is shocking that he died there.

plz go to my new blog. It’s about Turd’s tryst with Ramchandra Gandhi!!!. I don’t use this blog on Turd, its degrading…..

At my first school and some things personal

I have an embryonic tie with Jabalpur, it is where I took my first real steps to learning. I say real since I did go to LKG for few months at Siliguri, we had just landed from Tezpur and before that initiated into learning in cochin, small ceremony at home (if I calculate the number of houses I have stayed till date, it would easily exceed 50!!). I have a very sketchy image of siliguri, just recollect that we stayed very near to a railway line or so. And there where lots of wild elephants, particularly in Tezpur. I also recollect stranded for days because of flood. We had photos of flood and so on, we used to take camera on lend.

Cantonments don’t change much and so is cozy old Jabalpur it remains the same, I have deep attachment with this place. It remains the almost same and even after around three decades I could retrace the paths. I studied in St. Aloysius Boys School for around 3years (later shifted to KV). It is one of the reputed schools around only recently it was made coed. I recall being kissed by Mother Theresa, now this was just before she got Nobel Prize and acquired international fame. I really didn’t know about her greatness nor people around me even after she was awarded the Nobel Prize (frankly people around didn’t had clue about these prizes). It is only years later when I was going through school magazine from old box that I saw this photograph, and saw Mother Theresa and children queuing up to meet her, which I was also part of. St. Aloysius was quite a strict school, there were lots of Keralites and also Anglo Indians but they believed in caning children. And the school principal had a peculiar habit of caning kids while distributing report card, he used to start beating after the tenth rank, the intensity of cane increasing, peaking after 30^th. It was quite a sight since kids believed that if they put saliva it pains less and they licked their palms! 

The best part of the school was that they showed wild life videos, once a month. Just imagine having access to something like this in seventies!! The impact was such that even now I spend substantial amount of time on wildlife channel and try to know more and more about wildlife and visit sanctuaries.

Few months back when I was in Jabalpur I tried to locate the ‘colony’ where we stayed, I had almost lost it when I recollected that we had a huge square shaped water tank next to where we stayed. I did locate the ‘colony’; it is just the same quaint little place (and the water tank is red painted even now!). The water tank is something deeply etched in my memory…..it has some dark secrets. It’s like this I was seriously violent kid (at home in best of behavior!) I was into killing insects, butterflies (oh how many I have killed and maimed, it sickens me every time), dragonflies, ants…one of the ‘games’ I initiated was identifying ant hills, with few kids we pulled up some younger one and dropped him/her into the hill, held him for some time and run away….and the mother will come screaming ‘hai mera bacha hai hai!!’…I somehow specialized in ants later even identifying the varieties and chemical in the belly that could sting if dropped into eyes (it's formic acid dude!!. Kerala even has spiders miming ants). I must have given lots of kids’ ‘identification marks’ as I threw stones at animals (my sis for one got a deep gash on her chin). The water tank had huge beehives; it was one of the cherished endeavors of the kids to hit it. There stayed a beggar woman under it and that is where the tragedy unfolded. Once we managed to hit the beehive and ran off, the bees attacked the woman, she was covered with bees. The whole colony watched in horror, some threw her blanket, an army vehicle took her to the hospital, she barely survived. A part of me was sure it was me, a part of me negates it…but nobody ever doubted me (nice kid that one, he wouldn’t do it), it is only now that I am able to accept. But frankly I never expected such an eventuality. I was so shocked, shaken after that I never picked up a stone all my life, of course I did concentrate on insects but stone throwing was out. For long time I had her screams in my dreams….So unlike Ravi Shankar’s ‘Screams of Dragonflies’ the screams were that of the beggar woman. Even now when I see beehive I feel uneasy but yes those guys in Nepal (?) who collect honey defying death with no modern equipment are incredible! In my teens though I had stabilized into animal lover, spending lots of time with cows and calves at my grandmothers. Now I take special care not to hurt, particularly, insects. Insects are actually quite beautiful creatures if one has time to observe! I also make it a point to watch TV programs related to small creatures. I also hold the view that dung beetle wrestling (they do in east Asia) needs specific skills !

We had a cycle (Hercules) and although it was for adult and very heavy, I learned cycling here, riding ‘kaichi’ in the hot afternoons when everyone slept, since it was forbidden, caught and got whacked many times. What we did was each day it was someone’s turn to get the cycle- most kids father had cycle, and then took turn to ride. Once caught the plan was abandoned for the day. The games included marbles, climbing trees and so on…all forbidden so had to be in constant watch out. I did get some serious beatings for playing marbles finally they used tactics like ‘it will spoil your handwriting’ (since I was known for excellent handwriting which deteriorated subsequently). Later though life changed in Delhi it was cricket and football, in Jaipur kite flying…and as things brightened horse riding, badminton, squash and so on. Jabalpur though remains very special, I recall crying a lot when we were shifting (it did acquire legendary proportion in the correspondence of elders), the whole journey from Jabalpur to Sagar I was inconsolable, maybe since it was new for me later I did start looking forward (shall we say preparing myself) to shifting. I also recall being taken to school in cycle and I had this habit of shouting ‘ram ram bhaiya’ (the salutation word around here) to any passerby and every time my ear getting twisted!!.
Jabalpur has become very crowded though. Beda ghat remains the same but with some more buildings. The marble ghat and Narmada river is a sight to watch at night. In the meantime how about allu parantha and coffee for breakfast!!. Also introducing my co-passengers on the way to beda ghat